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    歡迎訪問海崖學網 您還沒有 [ 登錄 ] [ 注冊 ]

    我在等你呀

    時間:2019-03-19    來源:www.chcompsol.com    作者:晴天de向陽花  閱讀:

    “ 我愛你是我的事與其他無關 ”

    今天是我們吵架后斷斷續續未聯系的第27天,說起來連吵架都算不得。我們已經在一起了902天了,不會寫流水賬的記錄,僅當自己的回憶了。

    故事里開始嘍:

    我們在2016年8月份以相親的形式認識,一開始沒想著會在一起,我只是形式化的去見一面,因為母胎單身二十多年,不知道什么是談戀愛,一直想著我的白馬王子是以一種特別浪漫的形式出現在我的面前。就在8月的某一個周六下班后我們約在了家附近的商場,約好是7點,由于你下班晚了推到了7點半。我早早的就到了,在商場附近溜達,7點30快到了,你打來了電話,你說你到了,我不經意的說我看到你了。可能緣分就是這么巧,從來沒有見過面的兩個人,可以隔得遠遠的一眼就認出來。

    我們約在了商場一樓的必勝客,隨意的聊著天,因為不是一眼看上的,我還是比較隨意的,一看你就是相親有經驗了,時間、話題都把握的剛剛好。

    相親結束回家,本著不會再聯系的想法,敷衍著回復著。第一次見面后,又在短時間內見了幾次,緣分就這么開始了吧。我們每天都會聊天,從無聊的日常問候“早安”“吃飯了嗎”“下班了嗎”“晚安”,慢慢的發生了變化,2016年9月27日,我們相識的一個月以后,你帶我去了從來沒有去過的新城大橋,不浪漫的你帶著我從橋的這頭走到那頭,這個橋足足走了1個小時,走到橋的中間,欲言又止的你向我表白了,很尷尬的對白:“我喜歡你,做我女朋友吧。”我愣了一下,沒有遇到過這種場合,頓時腦袋一片空白,點了點頭說好,然后就傻傻的抱了抱。一起吃吃飯,因為一點都不浪漫,所以我提議我們去趣哪主題公園吧,有好多好多好看的燈。今天,應該是我最幸福的一天了吧。你說你要做我的騎士而不是白馬王子。

    haiyawenxue

    剛開始談戀愛的我們,就像初戀一樣,對我而言就是初戀,每天都會又說不完的話,打不完的電話,微信語音,我們可以聊到凌晨3點多,第二天繼續。。。。。好懷念當時的感覺,說不完的話,有被寵著的感覺。有任性的資本。

    我們一起去爬山,開車3小時爬上高高的山,處在熱戀的感覺,用不完的力氣,說不完的話。在山頂上,輕輕的抱著我,跟我說:“我愛你。”你知道嗎,我當時忍著沒有哭,而且心里早就決定非你不可了。就是那么沒有出息。我們下山開車回家,黑黑的路上,你牽著我的手,滿滿的安全感。

    熱戀期間滿滿的故事,每一件都很難忘。你記得我的生日,記得每一個節日送我的禮物都很喜歡。

    17年我們互見了家長,都很滿意,我們幸福的在一起,能感覺到你給我了滿滿安全感,每天下班很累了還陪我散步,我們的熱戀期是走出來的。 記得剛開始的時候,我們有聊不完的話題,說不完的話一個無聊的的話題我們可以聊好久。

    時間慢慢的過,慢慢的歸于平淡,但是安全感還是穩穩的,我們每天都會報告行程,互相分享著有趣的事情,我們的吵架幾乎為零。2017年10月是個開始,你決定要再買房,和父母產生了分歧,吵架了,我們倆也吵架了,知道你脾氣很倔,但是我想告訴你你的所有決定我都支持你。想在你無助的時候抱抱你,讓你知道,你還有我在。這件事情翻過去以后,我們又回歸了平靜,期間也有甜蜜和心酸。不知道浪漫的你大冬天帶我去野外看飛機,飛機飛過,我覺得我很幸福。

    18年過年我們第一次自駕游,反其道而行去了人煙稀少的青海湖,大冬天的,倆人就一起走了,大年三十我們一起去吃肯德基,但是還是很開心。不管走到哪里,有你我就很開心。回來之后開始上班,我們沒有互相去家里,雖然心里有點點介意。身邊的人都在問什么時候結婚,雖然我心里不舒服,但是還是想問你,最后因為這件事我們吵架了,所謂的吵架是我在吵,而你什么都不說。不知道為什么之前計劃著兩人要結婚,到現在卻變成了一提我們就會吵架的導火索。斷斷續續的冷戰,到3月份我沒忍住就主動聯系了你,然后就默契的不再提,我們又和好了,但是問題沒有解決,心里還是有芥蒂。5月份,因為同樣的問題,我們爆發了,我問你對我們的以后有計劃嗎?你居然和我說你恐婚,就這樣我們又冷戰了大半個月,我又沒忍住,求和了。因為太難受了,第一次知道什么叫心痛,我坐在大馬路上哭的控制不住自己,所以我覺得我不想分開,不想讓自己后悔。時間過去了,我們和好了,又恢復了以前的樣子,但是很默契的不在提這件事。到了19年,我們有一次自駕游,去了你一直想去的地方,回到家,去了我家吃飯,年就過完了。這次吵架的導火索同樣是之前沒有解決的問題。吵架的好處就是能把問題都拿出來,你告訴我你現在不考慮結婚,但是你知道嗎,我聽到了心都碎了。。。

    我有想過我們就這樣在一起吧,等你愿意的時候。但是在感情里,有的時候是要考慮兩個人的感受的,我倆都很倔強,遇到問題不是冷戰就是吵架。。。最受不了的就是你,每次遇到問題就是逃避,微信消失,電話不接。。。留我自己發狂。其實我想要的不是結果,是我們能一起溝通,站在統一戰線。讓父母安心,我們彼此給對方安全感,結不結婚都是一樣的。

    截止到今天,我已經打過好多次電話,都沒有接,每次都微信信息發了狠話,然后自己又后悔,就像獨角戲我自導自演。

    戀愛中,開始付出的是男生最后放不下的是女生。每天都把自己哭完就勸自己我要堅強,周邊的朋友閨蜜都勸我不然就放手吧,我也想放手,但是還是舍不得。可能心涼了自然就放手了吧。

    我的故事很簡單,平淡簡單,沒有什么蕩氣回腸,更多的是心酸。

    我還在等你,不想放棄。不知道自己執念的是什么。難道就是等到你的確確實實的分手才死心嗎。我居然都做不到灑灑脫脫的自己提分手。給大家做了返例。

    最后還是想說,這段感情我不后悔。起碼我努力爭取了,我愛你是我的事與其他無關,其實勇敢去追挺好的,起碼不會遺憾。

    我在等你,我們互相給對方一段時間去想,然后再做決定吧。

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